Published on : 13 October 20223 min reading time

Having a dream body or knowing all the positions of the Kamasutra is often not enough to master the “ars amatoria”. To become a perfect lover, you have to follow some rules, which the English sexologist Tracey Cox summarized in 7 points in the “Mail Online”.

LISTEN AND LEARN

To become the best lover your partner has ever had, all you need to do is follow one basic rule: do what he likes. The technique can be learned and improved, but it is essential to listen and be guided by your partner.

CUSTOMIZE THE THEORY

Sex is not a universal theory. What worked with one partner may not work with another. Even if you know all about the theory (how to stimulate with your hands, how to move your tongue or use sex toys), you need to know how to personalize it.

PRACTICE HELPS

The more sex you have (with the same person), the more likely you are to be a good lover. A 2012 study of 6,000 young women showed that the number of orgasms increased exponentially over time: if the first sexual encounter was awkward, the last sexual experiences became unforgettable.

DON’T JUDGE

It is essential to listen to your partner’s needs without taking them personally. Even if you don’t seem interested in what he or she is offering, always try not to judge.

BE OPEN TO EXPERIMENT

Often, routine is the tomb of love and even sex is no exception: making love is not like going to the gym. Most people are afraid to try new things under the covers because they’re afraid they won’t like it or they’ll look kinky. The right attitude for good sex, according to the sexologist, is to think “why not” and take the plunge.

BE ABLE TO TALK ABOUT SEX WITHOUT FEELING EMBARRASSED

It seems obvious, but talking about sex with your partner is essential to having a good sexual understanding. Of course, body language helps, but it is very important to use words to understand if you are “traveling” in the same direction…

BE CONFIDENT

Being attractive and having a great body can be a great calling card, but having confidence and feeling sexy is much more important than having a model’s physique. Moreover, as the sexologist reminds us, the perfect body does not exist: some men like Kim Kardashian’s shape, others, on the contrary, are disgusted by it.